I love you
Das in deutscher Sprache erschienene Buch "Ich liebe dich" wurde leicht verändert auch in englischer Sprache veröffentlicht.
Falling in Love is as Normal as Love
At the outset of a normal romantic relationship interpersonal interactions of the highest standard take place on all three levels of existence. They follow a wonderful structure, i.e. the structure of falling in love that has to be chaotically different compared to the prosaic, factual and moralistic order of society. If one acknowledges love as an authentic guide, this means that one should also search for guides in the process of falling in love.
Signs of Being in Love are Signs of Love
When people question what love means, falling in love provides the answers. This is where to turn to! Whatever destroys being in love also destroys man’s world in general. When the egotistical self is thrown out of its normal functioning, love is given time and space and this love wants everyone to fall in love with each other.
Whenever people help each other without ulterior motives we detect joy and enthusiasm as clear signs of love. Here the egotistical self is subdued and conscious awareness leads to the core of humanity.
Martin Luther King was in love with his dream and infected others. Love was uniting all of his followers. Empathy for people who have been devastated by catastrophes inwardly motivates many to help, to embrace those who are suffering and care for the children. This movement is falling in love. There is a zest for action, for establishing closeness and eradicating separation.
Loving Through Falling in Love
Even couples that have been together for many years experience their love through feelings of falling in love. When you love somebody you experience that love like a falling in love, be it after a couple of days or after 20 years. At the bottom of your heart you know that you love somebody, but if you also feel it, there is a movement towards or an awareness of the other. This movement is falling in love.
Do you sense that loving is a tangible movement, an opening up and that it is rooted in freedom? We have the same sensation when we fall in love. There is no difference in the feeling. And the situations where we experience love and falling in love don’t differ from each other either. Wherever love surfaces, falling in love is part of it. Based on this idea a couple can learn a lot more about themselves.
Falling in Love and Love Don’t Age
People who we once fell in love with will occupy a prominent position in our hearts for the rest of our lives. And if we haven’t hardened our hearts through disappointments, these people can generally reawaken loving feelings at any time. The previously experienced love created such a deep togetherness (wholeness) we never forget. When you take a look at the following list of adjectives it is easy to imagine that a person you once shared and experienced these attributes with is unforgettable. In its nature falling in love is alive, spontaneous, unforced, courageous, adventurous, empathetic, creative, inspiring, transforming, constructive, peaceful, imaginative, exciting, ecstatic, cooperative, symbiotic, protective, caring, witty, silly, playful, erotic, magical and mystical. All these aspects can be found in an ideal case of falling in love. Love or falling in love can only be a positive life experience because both states are ultimately the source of all life. Once the closeness connected with them has been felt, it leaves unerasable traces. Falling in love is ageless. It doesn’t matter if you are 20, 40, 60 or 80 years of age. For older couples that fall in love with each other again it feels the same way it did when they fell in love the first time when they were young. The fact that the above-mentioned attributes apply just as much now as they did then illustrates this.
The Emotion is the Same
At the start of our journey we researched the emotion of loving and falling in love. To this end we called on the expression ‘I love you’ as a basis for exploration. We discovered that the feelings of loving and falling in love are the same. Love feels like falling in love and vice versa.
Heavenly love is related to eternity and purity. To be happy ever after, the way most romantic movies and novels portray is a widespread wishful dream.
This kind of romanticised love actually contains a grain of truth about true love. Love should not wear off. It should always remain. This could actually happen if man were mature enough to recognise his egotistical self and work on it. Romantic love needs to overcome egotistical notions. It is neither naïve nor cheesy but actually desirable when one understands that falling in love gentlycontinuesthroughout the duration of the relationship. Flexibility and the willingness to make sacrifices are part of it.
Getting Closer to One’s Own Self
We already discussed that falling in love is also connected to the discovery of one’s own self. The lovers are given the chance to detect new characteristics while they learn to loveeach other. In a figurative sense both of them smash their stones (theiressence) into pieces and thus recognise their individual building blocks (traits) as if both of them looked into the same mirror. The fact that we fall in love several times at the outset of adulthood has a significant reason. Each time we are given a chance to get to know ourselves better in order to then enter into more solid relationships. Love operates through falling in love to make us more mature and strengthen our self-love through increased self-knowledge.
It remains undecided if a common denominator exists in respect of love. However, it would be quite probable because deep down all human beings are the same. Why shouldn’t we at some stage establish what unites each and every one of us? A short summary:
Love is the source of all emotions and feelings. Love and falling in love are filled with tenderness, devotion, acceptance and opening up. The feeling of love and falling in love is the same. The prominent side of falling in love is driven by biochemical and unconscious programmes, while love is the originator of these processes. Its characteristics of movement, change, flexibility and creativity ensure that a couple’s development receives positive stimuli. Love always entails falling in love. Falling in love means the production of wholeness through creativity. The interlocking processes during the event of falling in love give birth to a new wholeness, which makes the couple consolidate and create new scope for development. Each partner also experiences an increase of his or her own wholeness, thus broadening his or her self-awareness. The growth in wholeness is accompanied by beautiful feelings. These feelings are love’s gift.
After falling in love, a foundation typical to the couple remains and conveys a feeling of love. This foundation warrants the functioning of the relationship. The willingness and readiness to change the foundation are signs of love.
True love unites all humans unconditionally. False love is caused by the ego. This kind of love seeks drama, tears, isolation, control and personal advantages. True love on the other hand is sought out by the authentic self because only the authentic self can realise the good in people and as such long-term love. True love has no expectations and doesn’t impose rules. It is omnipresent and appears when the right conditions are present. True love has a direction and a target. It wants to create wholeness through togetherness and ultimately heaven on earth.
The evolution of love occurs through man. Love seeks composition and form. Each and every form of creative work stems from love. Love is the source of everything new.